ibuzoo:

on this website having an opinion is wrong and you’re an asshole for even having one

On social media, having an opinion or offering a considered response to something to something not agreed with is considered being ‘butt-hurt.’  

The bigger crisis: how many stay silent rather than speak out about anything that might be wrong, all in fear of being bullied over it?  

As someone who has never seen the 100, can you explain what went wrong with Clexa? You’ve mentioned it before and apparently it has something to do with intersexism and transmisogyny, but I’m kinda unsure the specifics.

thedeadflag:

Oh, the canon issues with clexa differ from the fandom issues with clexa.

Canon issues:

On the show, the showrunner (Jason Rothenburg) and staff aggressively baited the fandom, fueling the fire under the clexa fandom specifically to draw views, acclaim, etc. The fandom grew worried after season 2, because Alycia Debnam Carey (Lexa) was only renewed for a guest role, while she had recently signed on as a lead for an AMC show, Fear the Walking Dead. Generally, networks don’t let their stars play on other networks’ shows, and Alycia only getting contracted on part-time had people thinking she’d get killed off. Rothenburg and staff rushed onto social media to tell us we were idiots to think that, that they had too much respect for the character and the fandom to treat them that way. 

They repeatedly, repeatedly said that Clarke and Lexa would both be alive at the end of the season. When worries renewed after Alycia Debnam Carey was absent for nearly half a season’s worth of shooting, Rothenburg made a huge, huge deal about bringing her back in to film in the finale, inviting the fans to come see the scenes get shot in Vancouver, where fans could see Lexa and Clarke embrace and kiss.

The fandom was going wild with joy, and took the CW and Rothenburg and the 100 staff at their word. After all, they had been so reassuring, and so aggressive in their support. As Season 3 progressed, The 100′s social media focused heavily on Clexa, playing up on the recovering, budding romance. They leaked a sex scene that was set to air in episode 7 early, just to get the fans riled up.

And directly after that sex scene in episode 7, they killed Lexa off. Accidentally shot by a bullet not meant for her, a wound in a spot far less lethal than others had suffered in the show, with Clarke (a trained medic/surgeon) present. Lexa died in that episode, and the version of her that showed up in the finale was simply a stored virtual reality version of her.

The clexa fandom blew up in grief, and the show’s social media, cheered the ‘twist’, and claimed that the fandom was taking things too seriously when the LGBT+ fans rightfully lashed out over being baited on a show meant for a teen audience, one far more vulnerable than adults. 

Just the way the show treated the fans, the characters…it was hideous and cruel and some of the worst, ham-handed, shoehorned writing I’ve seen on television in my nearly 31 years. 


Fandom issues:

In the lead-up to season 3, and the anticipation of a romance involving Clarke and Lexa, a few big names in the fandom (none of whom were trans women, or intersex women) started a “Lexa’s Dick” meme. Prior to this, the fandom’s fan works were were solid. There was a surprisingly low amount of transmisogynistic, trans-fetishistic, intersexist content compared to other wlw fandoms. It’s part of what helped me feel safe to join it when I had, early on in season 2. 

Anyways, trans women like myself spoke out against the meme and how it was used to aggressively, joyfully fetishize trans women’s bodies. We were thoroughly, swiftly laughed off. if anything, the pushback against it only seemed to make people celebrate it more. Especially when season 3 started airing and the sexual tension started up on screen. The more that ‘Lexa’s Dick’ stuff spread on social media, the more fanworks of g!p and a/b/o tropes were made. And when lexa was killed off, one of the rallying cries as a means to cope was “Lexa’s Dick”, pushing people to revel in that even while the show was falling apart and had hurt everyone. 

There were people crying out against the Dead lesbians trope, the Bury Your Gays trope. There was a huge push to get people aware of how wlw were represented in media, how often they would get killed off directly after validating their relationship, how toxic wlw representation has historically been, etc. etc.

Rightfully so. Media representation is an important fight. nearly all fo the clexa fandom recognized that intimately, having been hurt by it.

But so, so many of those same people refused to acknowledge that they were causing the same abuse against trans and intersex women, by reproducing and reinforcing and celebrating our violently misrepresentative, fetishistic, toxic representation, and refusing to hear us when we spoke out on that. They’d cry over how the media wasn’t listening, the showrunners weren’t listening, how hetero fandoms were vilifying them and just didn’t understand. yet, they’d laugh us off when we’d bring up transmisogyny and trans fetishization, all while propping up monikers and orgs like “LGBT Fans Deserve Better” when they were aggressively dropping the T.

And that momentum behind trans fetishistic, intersexist works has only continued, and now The 100, as a fandom, is not so arguably the most saturated fiction-based wlw fandom when it comes to g!p and a/b/o fanworks. Some of those big names have since recanted their support for the trope, but generally haven’t done anything to work at undoing the damage they helped cause, haven’t done anything to make fandom safer for us.

Even today, some of the biggest names reproducing those works have patreons and paypals and whatever earning them good money each month by exploiting, misrepresenting, and fetishizing trans women, and directing harm against us. Some of them are published authors. Most of them are very well loved in the fandom and nearly no one actually speaks out against them for fear of causing drama, such is the hold that transmisogyny has on it. Apparently, it’s okay for trans women to suffer so long as other marginalized people might benefit. When they claim to be willing to do anything to help except stop harming trans women directly, it’s pretty telling who they deem disposable and not part of the wlw community, regardless of their offhand comments of ‘support’.

I’ve written extensively on this. I’ve a long post here covering most issues, I’ve a shorter one detailing the impact of these works on trans women here, and I’ve got data from g!p fanworks in the clexa fandom here, just to toss out a few things, if you’re ever curious.

I see so much defensiveness on this topic due to the idea that we have freedom of expression (well, depending upon where you live), that fetish-shaming is wrong and so long as the stories are tagged properly, you just have to live with ‘problematic’ content and not read it, if it is not for you.  No one is here to parent you and there are no safe places, so don’t even ask for them anymore, kthnksbai. All useful discussion stops here. 

Nothing in the OP’s articles (and, if you consider yourself a trans ally, I hope you read with an open heart and mind) call for censorship.  Her articles DO point out the inherent transmisogyny, intersexism, and heteronormative bias of these stories (basically presenting Lexa as a heterosexual male in all but name) and how they can relate to perpetuating damaging and hurtful images of trans women in media and, thus, perpetuate violence toward them in real life.  

Do we only care about what gets us off and not how it harms other people who are presented as the source of that fetish?  Do such stories fetishise abuse? Isn’t this what heterocentric porn has been criticised for for decades? 

I’m not blind for the need of many writers to exorcise a demon or two in their writing.  Some people write ‘dark fic’ that helps them cope with their own lived trauma.  Some people write g!p stories where the g!p character is presented in a positive light, is popular, successful, etc. with the hope that it will help ‘normalise’ being trans or intersex, to give a trans woman a happy ending she probably won’t see in real life (regardless of how problematic the depiction of her body or sexuality might be).  

People are going to have their fantasies and write what they will – but I hope we care as much about being educated and honouring the lived experience of other people (and thus truly honour our queer family in its entirety) and not reduce anyone to a truly damaging stereotype, to not bully trans women when they speak out with clarity and conviction over what is happening to them. 

The Clexa fandom rose up in rage when they realised they had been manipulated over the use of a damaging stereotype. We refused to back down and sought to educate others and change minds.  

Are we not willing to look ourselves in the eye when we do the same to one another?  I think this writer has some excellent points to make, I hope others read and absorb all the information and pass it on – build a respectful discussion. We – and our art – can only benefit.  

geekariffic:

Gay Tumblr: we didn’t get our way, this is homophobic!

Kiddos, if hearing that your ship of choice isn’t going to be canon is homophobia, then you live in privilege. If that’s the worst thing you can experience, then you’re doing pretty well.

Calm the fuck down. Queerbaiting involves actively seeking out a queer audience and trying to covet them by promising queer relationships.

This is literally the opposite of that. They’re telling you upfront what to expect.

This isn’t what the outrage was about. 

This didn’t start over fans being whingey over their ship not being canon – it was an actor making fun of them for thinking their ship was anything but ‘friendship’ in the first place.  It was the mocking sing-along he led with the cast (save McGrath who looked embarrassed and later tried to turn it around) that made them look homophobic and mean. They were rightly called out for it. Not for queerbaiting – for being rude and mean-spirited toward a fandom that hardly ever sees representation (even if it was a spontaneous act – the joke was at other people’s expense).  Imagine being a 12 year old Supercorp fan seeing your heroes making fun of you for thinking Kara and Lena could ever be together.  No one needs that.  And Jordan only made it worse when he issued an ‘apology’ that made himself out to be a victim.  

This was about the attitude and manners of so-called allies – it was hurtful.  

If there were people asking for SC to be canon – whinging about it, even – they didn’t deserve to be publicly humiliated over it.  We get around 1% of the representation out there – and we’re made fun of in the bargain?  They could have used the moment as an opportunity to discuss representation and what it means (as McGrath tried to do) – I guess it was easier to just make fun of it.  

you know what fucks me up a little?

iamthestrangerinmoscow:

breaks-out-the-high-g-note:

Doctor who was one of my biggest special interests right, still is, but I stopped. I don’t remember all the stuff I knew about doctor who before. Like yeah I can recite the doctors in ascending order and if you describe an episode to me I will probably be able to tell you the name of it, but a lot of stuff is gone, and it doesn’t feel the same. And that’s because I talked too much about it and had to be punished. Doctor who makes me really fucking happy and I wanted to share it with my parents because I love them, and they would get angry with me for knowing too much about it. They said it was an “unhealthy obsession” and they took my cards away, all my monster invasion and alien files cards, and my sonic screwdrivers and my tardis (which I bought with my own money). They would use them against me, for leverage. These things were like my sense of self and they were being used as a bargaining chip. They weeded out my special interests based on what was more productive; Nature could stay. But this one was just too much of an inconvenience.

Now I’m older and I know I shouldn’t talk about the things I love too much with my parents. They’ll get angry. And now I’m allowed all my stuff back, since I’m not annoying them about it anymore. I have my sonic screwdrivers, tardis, annuals, everything. But it doesn’t really feel the same… And it’s fucking shit.

That’s so fucked up I’m so sorry about it 😦 I feel this on a personal level because Doctor Who is my special interest and I can’t imagine how awful that must feel. My parents were never very happy with me being obsessed with it, but they never did anything as nasty as that.

And I also have an amazing grandmother who always supported me and because she knows DW makes me very happy she encouraged it since day one, like she always does with my special interests. She bought me so many DW books and other merch and she always defended me. And she watches every single episode so that we can discuss it together and every time we talk she asks “anything new in the Doctor Who world?” and I love that so much.

There are many stories out there of special interests being “beaten” out of autistic people, metaphorically or literally. I really hope you will recover from that and find something that will make you happy again.

There are many stories out there of special interests being “beaten” out of autistic people, metaphorically or literally. 

This just sings to me in so many ways.  It’s hard not to feel awful when you read about another generation dealing with this kind of treatment.  You wonder how things haven’t changed. 

In the 80s, my parents treated me much the same over my ‘specialised interests’ like Doctor Who. They made fun of me for it (and they watched when they were younger!). The damage this kind of mockery (by parents, by other authority figures) is so disfiguring. Most of them don’t care, either. They’ll never apologise. 

I’m grateful for finding community online over the years, hope others can find/have found the same.  

This triangular dynamic among bully, victim, and audience is what I mean by the deep structure of bullying. It deserves to be analyzed in the textbooks. Actually, it deserves to be set in giant neon letters everywhere: Bullying creates a moral drama in which the manner of the victim’s reaction to an act of aggression can be used as retrospective justification for the original act of aggression itself.

Not only does this drama appear at the very origins of bullying in early childhood; it is precisely the aspect that endures in adult life. I call it the “you two cut it out” fallacy. Anyone who frequents social media forums will recognize the pattern. Aggressor attacks. Target tries to rise above and do nothing. No one intervenes. Aggressor ramps up attack. Target tries to rise above and do nothing. No one intervenes. Aggressor further ramps up attack.

This can happen a dozen, fifty times, until finally, the target answers back. Then, and only then, a dozen voices immediately sound, crying “Fight! Fight! Look at those two idiots going at it!” or “Can’t you two just calm down and learn to see the other’s point of view?” The clever bully knows that this will happen—and that he will forfeit no points for being the aggressor. He also knows that if he tempers his aggression to just the right pitch, the victim’s response can itself be represented as the problem.

The Bully’s Pulpit

           On the elementary structure of domination

David Graeber

(via argyrocratie)

He also knows that if he tempers his aggression to just the right pitch, the victim’s response can itself be represented as the problem. 

Being a bigot and spouting bigotry is not illegal.  It is protected under the rights of free speech.  Even preaching bigotry is usually protected speech.  However.  

Targeted harassment is NOT free speech. 

Banning someone who supports and engages in the negation of other human lives isn’t an offense to freedom, it affirms it.

Freedom of speech does not include the right to terrorise other humans, to bully, to create an unsafe environment, to silence others.

Those who endorse a hateful style, who gather followers to engage in such fashion are no protectors of freedom, they would deny us all.

We can’t allow the rise to power of those who seek control using the endorsement of hate as a righteous cause.

Targeted harassment is NOT free speech.

Terrorism isn’t free speech, either.

Fighting back against targeted harassment is not reverse harassment.